Quick thinking
Quick thinking A guy tells his wife he has to work late, and takes his secretary to a hotel for some wild sex. On his way home, he notices a huge hickey on his neck and begins to panic. What would he tell his wife? Walking in the door he is greeted by his excited…
An old Soviet joke
An old Soviet joke Stalin invited General Zhukov into his office for a conference, and yells at him for 2 hours regarding the war’s slow progress. ​ As Zhukov steps out of the office, he mutters under his breath, “that damn mustachioed son of bitch!” ​ Unfortunately, he is overheard by Stalin’s secretary, who immediately…
A picture worth millions
A picture worth millions A Lawyer, representing a wealthy art collector called him and said, “Paul, I have some good news and I have some bad news.” The art collector replied, “I’ve had an awful day; Let’s hear the good news first.” The lawyer said, “Well, I met with your wife today and she informed…
A Lawyer, representing a wealthy art collector called him and said, “Paul, I have some good news and I have some bad news.”
A Lawyer, representing a wealthy art collector called him and said, “Paul, I have some good news and I have some bad news.” A Lawyer, representing a wealthy art collector called him and said, “Paul, I have some good news and I have some bad news.” The art collector replied, “I’ve had an awful day;…
A guy comes home from work and he is clearly upset.
A guy comes home from work and he is clearly upset. His wife looks concerned and asks him what’s wrong. He shakes his head and refuses to say anything. Later, during dinner, he’s just pushing his food around on his plate and staring out the window. “Honey, what is it? I’ve never seen you like…
A man is walk on the beach, when he kicks a bottle.
A man is walk on the beach, when he kicks a bottle. Poof, out pops a genie. The genie tells the man he will grant him three wishes, but whatever he wishes for, his mother in-law gets double. Understanding the rule, the mans first wish is a billion dollars. The genie says, “ this means…
A man went to the hospital to visit his mother-in-law, who was in serious condition.
A man went to the hospital to visit his mother-in-law, who was in serious condition. On the way back the wife, very worried, asks: “So, honey? How’s my mom doing?” He replies: “She looks great! She is in good health! She will still live for many years! Next week she will be released from the…
Little Johnny comes into the house for dinner after playing outside all afternoon
Little Johnny comes into the house for dinner after playing outside all afternoon His parents ask him what he did today. He says that he played football and then he proposed to his friend Emily. His parents think this is really sweet and they don’t want to make fun of Little Johnny so they ask…
A cowboy walks into a bar…
A cowboy walks into a bar… …and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance then causally looks at his watch for a moment. The woman notices this and asks, “Is your date running late?” “No”, he replies,”I just got this state-of the-art watch, and I was just…
A man runs out of petrol
A man runs out of petrol A MAN was driving down the road and ran out of petrol. At that moment, a bee flew in his window. “What seems to be the problem?” asked the bee. “I’m out of petrol,” the man replied. The bee told the man to wait right there and flew away….