A mother and her young daughter are going home by taxi at night… after some time they’re passing by the red-light district and the young girl discovers some prostitutes on the street. She asks her mother: “Mom, what are they doing?” The mother replies: “They’re just guarding the parked cars.” The taxi driver intervenes: “Don’t…
Bill Clinton is on Air Force One when the Flight Attendant approaches with the lunch menu… Bill looks at the menu briefly, and then looks up and down at the attendant before giving her a wink. He leans over and says “Well, I sure could go for a quickie right about now.” The Attendant is…
A man walks into a bar and orders a whiskey… A man walks into a bar and orders a whiskey. The barkeep says “That’ll be 2 pence” “2 pence!?” said the man. “That’s cheap! Do you sell food?” “Yep” , said the barkeep “Alright, I’ll have a steak and chips” replied the man “Sure” said…
A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed. At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore,he is worried. Next morning,not only…
A groom meets up with his groomsmen at the alter with a huge smile on his face. The best man looks at him and says, “wow, dude, you are really looking forward to this, huh?” The groom replies, “bro, I just got the best blow job I have ever had in my LIFE, and a…
Maria, a maid, asks her boss for a raise. Her boss is annoyed and asks, “Now, Maria, why do you think you deserve a raise?” Maria: ‘Well, Señora, there are three reasons why I want an raise. First, I iron better than you.’ Wife: ‘Who said you iron better than me?’ Maria: ‘Your husband said…
I caught a really bad case of the flu in Madrid. Whilst sniffling and coughing and rolling around in the hotel bed, I realised I needed medical attention, so I called the concierge to get help. “Oh, so you’re sick!” came the reply. “Not a problem, we’ll send our very own hotel doctor up to…
Mohammad, a child of Arab parents was enrolled in a school in New York. On the first day, his teacher asked, ‘What is your name?’ The boy replied, ‘Mohammad’. ‘From now on your name is Harry as you are in America,’ she said. In the evening, when he came back, his mother asked, ‘How was…
A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, “Please, may I hide under your skirt. i’ll explain later.” The nun agreed… A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, “Sister, have you seen a soldier?” The nun replied, “He went that way.” After the MPs ran off, the soldier…
A woman heavily pregnant with twins gets shot twice in the stomach… The woman survives and so do the babies, she eventually gives birth to a boy and a girl. many years later the girl came running up to her mum “Mummy mummy, I was having a wee and a bullet came out” the mum…