I tried to explain to my 4 year old son that it’s perfectly normal to accidentally poop your pants. But he’s not buying it, in fact he’s still making fun of me. Edit: Thanks for the karma, and damn Reddit is not shy about telling internet strangers they pooped in their pants. Edit 2: Thank…
A middle-aged housewife decides to donate her old clothes to charity Wife: “I’ve gathered up some old clothes and I need you to drop them off at the church charity.” Husband: *Groaning* ” Why not just throw them out? It’s easier that way.” Wife: “Because there are people out there who are poor and starving…
Bobby’s mother returns Bobby’s mother had been away for a few weeks, so when she returned she asked Bobby how he had been. “Well, there was a big thunderstorm one night, so Daddy and me slept together.” The young French maid, who happened to overhear, said, “you mean Daddy and I.” “No,” Bobby said, “That…
A kid was talking with his mother. He says : Mom i’ve seen Dad with maid doing……. His mom shushed him and said wait till the dad comes home. When his dad comes home, the mother asks her kid, Yes son what were you saying. Kid Says : Mom i’ve seen dad with maid doing…
A maid decided it was time to demand a raise, so she went directly to the Lady of the house’s private study Maid: “I’d like a raise.” Mrs. Smith:”Why do you think you deserve a raise? Maid:”Three reasons. First, I can cook better than you.” Mrs. Smith:”Who told you that?” Maid:”Your husband. Second, I clean…
My wife was in the garden. She started yelling to me. Her: There are two spiders here, “is that a mummy longlegs under the daddy longlegs.? Me: No don’t be silly there are no mummy longlegs only daddy longlegs. “I felt pretty proud of myself with my answer. Until she stomps on both spiders, “Well…
Infidelity The secretary of a high-priced lawyer announced to him the arrival of a new client- a gorgeous young woman. The woman was seated and said, ‘I want a divorce.” “On what grounds,” asked the lawyer. “Infidelity, I don’t think my husband has been faithful to me.” “What makes you think that.” “Well, I don’t…
$100 Bill Tattoo A guy asks for a tattoo of a $100 bill on his penis. Curious, the tattoo artist asks him why he would possibly want that. He replies, “Three reasons: I like to play with my money, I like to watch my money grow, and $100 seems to be the only thing my…
My sister asked me to take off her clothes So I took off her shirt. Then she said, “Take off my skirt.” I took off her skirt. “Take off my shoes.” I took off her shoes. “Now take off my bra and panties.” and so I took them off. Then she looked at me and…
A boy is writing a paper on childbirth and asks his parents, “How was I born?” His mother awkwardly answers, “The stork brought you.” “Oh,” says the boy. “Well, how were you and Daddy born?” “Um, well, the stork brought us, too, and Grandpa and Grandma.” The boy begins his paper, “This report has been…