A farmer’s son joins reddit and finds the r/Jokes subreddit “Father, father!” he says to the farmer, “This subreddit is amazing! It’s full of so many good jokes, I wish I could be just as funny as all the redditors I’ve seen.” The farmer laughs at his son and tells him, “Son, if you really…
My 4 year old son just got me with a dad joke I hadn’t heard before. My son was playing with his teenage mutant ninja turtle action figures, and was making them fight each other. Me: “Where are their weapons? Are they just fighting with their bare hands?” Son: “No, they are fighting with their…
The son of a bitch Henry was doing maths homework, saying to himself… “2+5, the son of a bitch is 7” “3+6, the son of a bitch is 9″ His mother heard this & asked, ” Henry ! What is this nonsense you are doing?” “Oh Mom. Don’t disturb. I am doing my maths homework”…
Four Catholic ladies are having coffee together, discussing how important their children are. The first one tells her friends, “My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him “Father.” The second Catholic women chirps, “Well, my son is a Bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, “Your Grace.”…
A father buys a lie detector A father buys a lie detector robot that slaps people when they lie. He decides to test it out at dinner one night. The father asks his son what he did that afternoon. The son says, “I did some schoolwork.” The robot slaps the son. The son says, “Ok,…
A man is praying in church. He looks up to heaven and says “God, could you answer a question for me?” “Of course, my son,” says God, “what would you like to know?” “God, what is a million years to you?” “Well,” says God, “a million years to me is as a second.” “Hmm,” says…
A boy goes into confession… The boy tells the priest, “Father I’m afraid I’ve been with a loose girl.” “Hmm, ok son, what was the girls name?” “Oh I can’t say.” “Was it Mary Jane?” “No Father.” “Adalina Mozarelli?” “My lips are sealed.” “How about Cindy King” “I can never say.” “Oh come on boy,…
Jesus was worried about the drug epidemic plaguing the world. In an effort to solve this dilemma, he decided that a few apostles would return to earth and fetch a sample of each drug, so they could understand what these substances did… Two days after the operation is implemented, the disciples begin to return. Jesus,…
Jesus is down by the gates to Heaven When an old man approaches. “Well, what have you done to deserve entry to Heaven?” Asks St Peter. “To be honest.” replies the man, “I am merely a simple carpenter. It was my son who was truly great. Although he wasn’t my biological son… his birth was…