A cowboy appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates… ‘Have you ever done anything of particular merit?’ St. Peter asked. ​ ‘Well, I can think of one thing,’ the cowboy offered. ‘On a trip to the Black Hills out in South Dakota , I came upon a gang of bikers, who were threatening a…
Taxi ride A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him something. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up onto the sidewalk, and stopped inches away from a woman with a baby stroller. For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver…
A passenger in a taxi tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him something. The driver screamed, lost control of the cab, nearly hit a bus, drove up over the curb, and stopped just inches from a large plate glass window. For a few moments everything was silent in the cab, then the driver…
A taxi driver speeds through a red light without even looking And the passenger says, “whoa, what are you doing?! That was a red!” The driver replies, “don’t worry about it. My cousin, he does it all the time.” The passenger sits back until the driver blows through another red. He practically leaps out of…
A kindergarten teacher asked her students to talk about what they did during the recent school holidays. She asked them to use “grown-up words” as opposed to baby language. The first little one said he went to see his “nana.” The teacher said, “No! You went to see your ‘grandmother.’ Use grown-up words.” The next…
My 4 year old son just got me with a dad joke I hadn’t heard before. My son was playing with his teenage mutant ninja turtle action figures, and was making them fight each other. Me: “Where are their weapons? Are they just fighting with their bare hands?” Son: “No, they are fighting with their…
The genie of the lamp Two neighbours, one is rich and the other is poor. The poor have a magic lamp : Every morning,he wipes the lamp and a genie comes out and say : “Ask what you want” ,and the poor asks for a cup of tea. The rich neighbour,envious of the magic lamp,said…
3 blonde women are on one side of a river… …wondering how they will get across. The first one decides to pray saying “God please make me smart enough to get across this river.” so God turns her into a brunette and she swims across the river. The second also prays saying “Dear God, please…
A very drunk man in a bar orders another scotch. The bartender says, “You’re too drunk, Joe, go home. Joe says, “Fine, I’ll take my business elsewhere,” and walks out. A few minutes later he walks back in and says, “I’ll have a scotch.” The bartender says, “Joe, I told you. You’re too drunk. Go…