A story about my first time The sky was dark The moon was high All alone just she and I. Her hair was soft Her eyes were blue I knew just what she wanted to do. Her skin so soft Her legs so fine I ran my fingers down her spine. I didn’t know how…
Probably one for British people A man and his wife were on their honeymoon and about to do the deed. The wife stops the husband unexpectedly. “Darling,” she says. “I am afraid I have a dark secret to tell you, and I haven’t been entirely honest with you.” “Sweetheart, no matter what you have done…
Tim decided to tie the knot with his long time girlfriend. One evening, after the honeymoon, he was organizing his golfing equipment. His wife was standing nearby watching him. After a long period of silence she finally speaks: “Tim, I’ve been thinking, now that we’re married maybe it’s time you quit golfing. You spend so…
Terrifying Story A guy in a taxi wanted to speak to the driver so he leaned forward and tapped him on the shoulder. The driver screamed, jumped up in the air and yanked the wheel over. The car mounted the curb, demolished a lamppost and came to a stop inches from a shop window. The…
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to the Super Bowl. They had great seats right behind the Chiefs’ bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked it. “Oh, I really liked it,” she replied, “especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were killing each…
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. “Oh, I really liked it,” she replied, “especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were…
Carolyn, a rich blonde, buys a new automatic Jaguar XKR Sport. She drives the car perfectly well during the day, but at night, the car just won’t move at all… After trying to drive the car at night for a week (but without any luck), she furiously calls the Jaguar dealers and they send out…
While watching TV with his wife, a man tosses peanuts into the air and catches them in his mouth. Just as he throws another peanut into the air, the front door opens, causing him to turn his head. The peanut falls into his ear and gets stuck. His daughter comes in with her date. The…
Four doctors are talking. “The British doctor says, medicine is so advanced in Britain that we cut off a man’s liver, put it in another man, and in 6 weeks, he was looking for a job.” The German doctor replies: “That’s nothing. In Germany, we took part of a brain, put it in another man,…
The Bathtub Test During a visit to the mental asylum, I asked the director how do you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalized. “Well” said the director, “we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty…