On a flight back from Russia, a flight attendant sees a suspicious looking couple on board, so she reports it to the captain immediately… “Sir, I think we have a case of human trafficking! There is a very pretty and quiet female passenger on board, who looks quite frightened and the man she is with…
After waiting more than an hour and a half for her date, the young lady decided she’d been stood up. Exasperated, she changed from her dinner dress into pajamas and slippers, fixed some popcorn and resigned herself to an evening of TV. No sooner had she flopped down in front of the TV than her…
We should have a TV show where illegal immigrants hunt down sex offenders for a chance at citizenship We can call it “Alien vs Predator” [EDIT]: Wow I can’t believe the amount of people who would want to make it a reality. *Netflix if your seeing this post you know what to do.* **If you…
Wife sends her programmer husband grocery shopping She tells him: “I need butter, sugar and cooking oil. Also, get a loaf of bread and if they have eggs, get 6.” The husband returns with the butter, sugar and cooking oil, as well as 6 loaves of bread. The wife asks: “Why the hell did you…
Blondes At The Bus Stop. Two blondes are waiting at a bus stop. A bus pulls up and opens the door. One of the blondes leans inside, asking the driver – “will this bus take me to 5th Avenue?” The bus driver shakes his head, “no, I’m sorry, it won’t” he says. The other blonde…
I saw a little boy at the bus stop eating a giant chocolate Easter bunny. I said, “Hey kid, eating that much chocolate at one time is bad for you.” He looked me in the eye and said, “Well, my grandpa lived to 103.” “Oh, really? Did *he* eat a lot of chocolate?” “No, he…
Grudge Pregnancy A man went to the doctor and said, “My wife’s pregnant, but we haven’t had sex in over a year. I don’t understand it.” ​ The doctor said, “It’s what we in the medical profession call a grudge pregnancy.” ​ The man asked, “What’s a grudge pregnancy?” ​ The doctor replied, “Well, somebody’s…
A travelling salesman walks up to a house and knocks on the door. A travelling salesman walks up to a house and knocks on the door. A 10 year old boy answers the door in a dress and bra with a cigar in one hand and whiskey in the other. The traveling salesman asks, “Excuse…
So my wife came up to me and said, “Take off my shirt.” So I took off her shirt. Then she said, “Take off my skirt.” I took off her skirt. “Take off my shoes.” I took off her shoes. “Now my hose, bra, and panties.” I took them off. Then she looked at me…
2 men at an airport. 2 men at an airport. 1st man says, “I can’t find my wife.” 2nd man says, “I can’t find mine either, what does yours look like?” 1st man ” Six foot tall, blonde, big tits, mini skirt, high heels and a boob tube, whats yours look like?” 2nd man says,…