A sadist, a masochist, a murderer, a necrophile, a zoophile and a pyromaniac are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution. “Let’s have sex with a cat?” asked the zoophile. “Let’s have sex with the cat and then torture it,” says the sadist. “Let’s have sex with the cat, torture it and then…
Teacher asks Johnny what he want to be when he grows up. “I Wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive club, take the best bitch, give her a Ferrari over a million, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe; an Infinite visa card, and make love…
A kid trying to catch an STD The police pick up a young kid at 2 am, in the red light district and ask him what he’s doing “Looking for a prostitute” “Why do you want to find a prostitute?” “So I can catch an STD!” “Why would you want to do that?” “Well, if…
It’s also mine Interviewer: How much milk do these cows give? Farmer: Which one? The Black one or the brown one? Interviewer: Brown one. Farmer: A couple of litres per day. Interviewer: And the black one? Farmer: A couple of litres per day. Interviewer(naturally a bit flummoxed): I see. What do you give them to…
The flight attendant see’s a suspicious looking couple onboard, so she reports it to the Captain immediately. “Sir, I think we have a case of human trafficking! There is a very pretty, graceful and rich looking female passenger onboard. She looks quite frightened and the man she is with is a fat, old, redhead slob…
Mormon and an Irishman are on a plane A Mormon was seated next to an Irishman on a flight from London to the US. After the plane was airborne, drink orders were taken. The Irishman asked for a whiskey, which was promptly brought and placed before him. The flight attendant then asked the Mormon…
So, these two engineers are trying to determine the height of a flagpole… …A blonde woman wearing a tool belt and hardhat comes walking by, notices the engineers with their problem and goes over to help. She loosens the bolts at the base of the pole, lays it down on its side, then takes her…
A blonde got tired of blonde jokes… One evening, she went home and memorized all the state capitals. Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement, “I’ve had it up to here with these blonde jokes. I want you to know…
One dismal rainy night, a taxi driver spots an arm waving from the shadows of an alley halfway down the block. Even before he rolls to a stop at the curb, a figure leaps into the cab and slams the door. Checking his rear view mirror as he pulls away, he is startled to see…
Newlyweds went on their honeymoon and were getting undressed together for the first time . He took off his shoes and socks and his toes were all twisted and discolored. “What happened to you feet?” his wife asked. “I had a childhood disease called tolio.” “Don’t you mean polio?” “No, tolio, it only affects the…