My wife’s contractions were getting closer so we dashed off to the hospital. After getting checked in, the obstetrician came into the room, examined my wife, wrote “Annie” on her chart and left the room. We were obviously confused and asked the nurse what it meant. She said “This means you can go home —…
Four men are in the hospital waiting room because their wives are having babies. A nurse goes up to the first guy and says, “Congratulations! You’re the father of twins.” “That’s odd,” answers the man. “I work for the Minnesota Twins!” A nurse says to the second guy, “Congratulations! You’re the father of triplets!” “That’s…
The whale jizz on my doorstep 5 years ago on this very night, I found a jar of whale jizz on my doorstep. It was beaten and injured, it needed my help. I nursed it back to health and raised it like my own son. Today it finally graduated from university and I was just…
Three men were in a hospital An Englishman, a French, and a Congolese were expecting to receive their babies from the ward. The doctor comes out with three nurses; each carting a baby. “Gentlemen, I’m afraid I have some bad news…” says the doctor, “there was a mix-up and I’m afraid we cannot determine which…
An elderly gentleman was on his deathbed as his wife and three children and nurse stood close by Then he spoke:“Bill, you take the Beverly Hills houses.“Mary, you take the offices in the Center Center.“Debra, the apartments over the L.A. Plaza are yours.“To my dear wife, take all the residential buildings near downtown.” The nurse…
4 men are in the hospital waiting room waiting for their babies The nurse walks in and tells the first man: “Congratulations you’re having twins.” The man responds: “That’s a crazy coincidence, i work for the Minnesota twins.” The nurse tells the second man: “Congratulations you’re having triplets.” The man responds: “That’s a crazy coincidence,…
So I went in to get my vasectomy… So I went in to get my vasectomy, feeling a bit anxious about the procedure. The nurse, trying to ease my nerves, assured me that she’d sterilized everything and it would all be over soon. Just as I was starting to relax, the doctor walked in with…
a joke we tell in Ukraine A russian, a Ukrainian and an African American guys are sitting in the waiting room while their wives give birth. The nurse comes out with 3 babies and says “sorry guys, they’ve got mixed up..let’s see whose is whose”. The Ukrainian takes a black kid and runs. They yell…
“Did the doctor stop in to see you yet?” the Nurse asked the patient who had been waiting in an exam room. “Yeah, but it was really strange. He came into the room with a woman, said something about having to go defeat the Daleks, then they hopped in a phone box, and dissapeared. “Oh,…
A man goes to the hospital to see if he has diabetes. Once he arrives, a nurse asks him for a urine sample. He complies, and moments later, the nurse comes back into the room with the results. “I’m sorry, sir, but we’ve found high traces of glucose in your urine. You’re diabetic.” She says….