Category: Honeymoon Jokes

A couple of newlyweds on were on their honeymoon and moments before the passionate love making commenced, the wife says to the husband, “Please, be gentle, I’m still a virgin.” The husband was shocked and replied, “How’s this possible? You’ve been married *three* times before!” The wife responds, “Well, my first husband was a gynecologist…

A couple is celebrating their 25th wedding anniversary … They rent the same hotel room they spent their honeymoon in. The wife undresses and says, “25 years ago, when you first saw me naked, what were you thinking?” The husband says, “I was thinking that I wanted to fuck your brains out and suck your…

A man and a women are in Hawaii on their honeymoon They start arguing over the pronunciation of “Hawaii”. The man says it is pronounced “Hawaii” while the woman firmly believes it is pronounced “Havaii”. The woman is sick of this silly argument interfering with their vacation so she asks a local how it is…

A 60 years old billionaire marries a hot 25 year old girl.. After honeymoon they throw a party celebrating their marriage.. After a few drinks, billionaire’s friends want to know the secret of how he landed 25 yo hottie.. “It’s simple” billionaire boasts… “I faked my age” “Yes, but even for a 40/45 years old…

A deaf couple gets married On the night of the honeymoon the wife signs “since we can’t see what the other is signing after the lights go out, if you’d like to make love any night grab my right breast. If not, grab my left.” The husband signs back “Great idea. If *you’d* like to…

A Christian couple Newlyweds wake up one morning on their honeymoon and the man suggests: “Darling, why don’t you brew us some coffee?” Wife looks confused: “But that’s your task, honey.” “What? Why?” “It’s all over the Bible, dearest.” “The Bible says nothing about who’s supposed to be brewing coffee!” The wife grabs hold of…

A 60 years old billionaire marries a hot 25 year old girl… After honeymoon they throw a party celebrating their marriage… After a few drinks, billionaire’s friends want to know the secret of how he landed 25 yo hottie.. “It’s simple” billionaire boasts… “I faked my age” “Yes, but even for a 40/45 years old…

A deaf married couple are on their honeymoon… They were both inexperienced sexually and were having a bit of trouble communicating with the lights off. Finally the wife turns on the lights and signs: “If you are horny, squeeze my tits once, If you are not, squeeze twice.” The husband thought about this and signed…

A cowboy and his wife had just got married and found a nice hotel for their wedding night. The cowboy approaches the front desk and asked for a room. He said, ‘We’re on our honeymoon and we need a nice room with a good strong bed. The clerk winked, ‘You want the ‘Bridal’?’ The cowboy…

Man says to his new bride…. After the honeymoon, the new wife told her husband, “I think it’s time for you to stop playing golf. In fact, you might as well sell all of your clubs.” The husband replied, “You’re starting to sound like my ex-wife.” His wife looked at him crossly and said, “I…