The trump family is flying from New York to DC Donald looks down on the cities below and says “I think I’ll throw a 1000$ bill out of the window and make some american happy. Melanie says “Oh honey why not throw 10 100$ bills and make 10 americans happy?” So then Ivanka says “Even…
A little girl wakes up and is hungry. Her mom normally makes her breakfast, but she is in the shower The girl tells her dad she is really hungry. Dad makes her toast with butter, and squirts some honey on top The girl hasn’t had that before, and she really likes it. She says “Daddy,…
Happy father’s day! 5 year old son after reading story of a king says to his mom: Son: Mom, I also want 3 wives… one will cook, one will sing, one will bathe me Mom: And which one will put you to sleep Son: No mom, i will still sleep with you Mom’s eyes filled…
A young boy went to church with his mother Midway through the service, the boy loudly said “Mama, I have to pee!” After taking him to the bathroom, his mother said “It’s rude to say ‘pee’ in public like this. Next time in church, just say you have to ‘whisper.’” The next week, the boy…
A bear walks into a bar… The bear says: “I’d like a whiskey and……………………….coke please. Bartender says: “Why the big pause?” Bear replies: “I was born with them.” Edit: Thanks for the upvotes! I actually lived this joke right before posting while making dinner for my kids (changed the drink and location). Here’s how it…
Best son ever 5 year old son after reading a story of a king Son : mom, I also want 3 wives, one will bathe , one will cook and one will sing Mom : which one will put you to sleep? Son: no mom, I will still sleep with you. Mom’s eyes filled up…
My six year old daughter was watching me shave this morning.. “Why do you shave, daddy?” she enquired. “Because mommy likes me with nice smooth skin.” I explained. “Does it hurt?” she asked. “No, not at all.” I said. “Unless I cut myself.” “And then do you put a Band Aid on?” She asked. “No,…
A teacher asks her 2nd grade class… “Who’s a Trump fan?” Not wanting to look stupid for not knowing what that meant, they all raised their hands except for Johnny. “And why aren’t you a Trump fan?” she asked, used to Johnny always trying to be different. “Because I’m a Sanders fan” he replied. “And…
5 year old son after reading a story of a king: Son: Mom I also want 5 wives. One will cook, one will sing, one will dance and one will bath me. Mom: And one will put you to sleep Son: No mom, I will still sleep with you. Mom’s eyes filled up with tears…
God bless you son 5 year old son after reading story of a king. Son:Mom, I also want 5 wives..one will cook, one will sing, one will bathe me……. Mom:….And one will put you to sleep Son:..No mom, i will still sleep with you Mom’s eyes filled up with tears … God bless you son…