A man walks into a brain store to buy a new brain He goes to the clerk and says “Hello, I’d like to purchase a new brain”. The clerk replies with “Sure, here are some of our brains we have on sale” “Here’s the brain of a physicist, 5 dollars.” “Here’s our second deal for…
Trumpets and Guns In a small town, a man just opened a small store selling trumpets and guns. One day his neighbor pays him a visit and says, “So how is your strange business going?” “What do you mean strange?” “Because you sell only trumpets and guns!” “So?” “Well, let me put it this way,…
Don’t drink too much liquor. You will go to Hell. Priest – Don’t drink too much liquor. You will go to Hell. Alcoholic – Is it? What about the guy who sells the liquor? Priest – He will also go to Hell. Alcoholic – Ok, what about the guy who sells pork tacos in the…
I rode to the liquor store yesterday on my bicycle… I bought a bottle of Rum and put it in the bicycle basket. As I was about to leave I thought for a moment. If I fall off the bicycle, the bottle might break. To avoid that, I drank all of the rum before I…
A baby camel asks his father, “Dad, why do we have a hump on our back?” The dad replies, “So that we can store water in those.” He then asks, “Why do we have hooves then?” The dad replies, “To prevent our feet from sinking in the sand.” After thinking this over, he then asks,…
A guy walks into a bar A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. “How you doing today?” the bartender asks. “Actually, earlier today I was feeling really down. Depressed even,” the guy says. “But then I parked in a handicapped stall at the grocery store and then I had a bunch of…
Two retired business men sitting on a beach. Mike: Nice to meet you. I’m a retired businessman. When my store burned down, rather than rebuilding I took the insurance money and retired here. John: You know, I’m a retired businessman, too. When a flood washed away my store I took the insurance money and retired…
Guy walks into a store… Guy walks into a store and asks the clerk, “Where’s the alcohol?” Clerk replies, “I’m sorry, this is a candy store.” Guy pleads, “Do you have any candy with alcohol in it?” Clerk walks down an aisle and returns with a bag. Guy looks at the bag and says, “This…
A father at the church asked a newly wed couple to practice celibacy for a month in order to join the church. After a month they returned and made it known that they had failed The husband said that he kept strong till day 27 but then his wife dropped a cereal box and when…
A man notices a Mexican bookstore He decides to go in because he has never seen a Mexican book store before. He browses through the store and finally asks the clerk, “Do you have the book on Donald Trump’s foreign policies with Mexico?” The clerk replies, “Fuck you!! Get out, and stay out!!” The man…