An 88-year old man came to the hospital and said to the doctor, “Doctor, my 18 year old wife is pregnant with my child.” The doctor paused and said, “There was a master bear shooter in a village. He never missed a shot. But one day he was in a hurry, and took his umbrella…
First golf joke I’ve heard less than 1,000,000 times. A Catholic, a Baptist and a Mormon are bragging about the size of their families. “I have four boys, and my wife is expecting another,” says the Catholic. “One more son, and I’ll have a basketball team.” “That’s nothing,” says the Baptist. “I have 10 boys…
A woman is pregnant with twins when she gets into a car accident… …she wakes up in the hospital and the doctor says her twins have already been delivered, a boy and a girl. But since she wasn’t around to name them, they had to ask her brother to give them legal names. The woman…
One day, during a lesson on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands for who could use the word “beautiful” in the same sentence twice. First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, “My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it.” “Very good, Suzie,” replied…
A lady almost 9 months pregnant falls down some stairs and knocks herself out… When she wakes up, she is in a hospital bed. Doctor: “We had to deliver your fraternal twins while you slept, but they are completely healthy. Also, your brother stopped by and named them for you” New Mother: “My brother named…
A young girl came home from college and mentioned that she was thinking about having a baby. Assuming her daughter may already be pregnant, her mother was furious. “What the hell? How’d you get knocked up like this? Who’s the father?” “Mom, you’ve got it all wrong,” her daughter replied, “It’s a class project about…
A pregnant woman falls into a coma.. A 3 month pregnant woman falls into a deep coma. 6 months later she awakes and asks the doctor about her baby. Doctor: Don’t worry. You had twins, a boy and a girl and your brother named them for you. Woman: Oh no, not my brother! He’s an…
What’s in a name? A pregnant woman lapses into a coma. She awakens and frantically calls for her doctor. “You had twins, a boy and a girl. They’re fine,” he says. “Your brother named them.” Oh, no, the new mother thinks. He’s an idiot. Expecting the worst, she asks, “What’s the girl’s name?” “Denise,” the doctor…
A woman who is 3 months pregnant falls into a deep coma. 6 months later, she awakes and asks the doctor about her baby. Doctor: You had twins, a boy and a girl, and they are both fine. Luckily, your brother named them for you. Woman: Oh no, not my brother! He’s an idiot! What…
A pregnant woman falls into a coma A pregnant woman falls into a deep coma. 5 months later she awakes and asks the doctor about her baby. Doctor: Don’t worry. You had two baby boys and your husband named them for you. Woman: Oh no, not my husband; He’s a knucklehead! What did he name…