Category: Naked Jokes

One dismal rainy night, a taxi driver spots an arm waving from the shadows of an alley halfway down the block. Even before he rolls to a stop at the curb, a figure leaps into the cab and slams the door. Checking his rear view mirror as he pulls away, he is startled to see…

So a naked woman walks into a bar and asks for a beer… The bartender stares at her body from head to toe then serves her a beer. She drinks it and asks for another beer. The bartender stares at her for longer and serves her a second beer. The woman again drinks it and…

A Brit, A Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the garden of Eden “Look at their reserve, their calm,” muses the Brit.”They must be British” They pondered this possibility but the Frenchman and the Russians soon shake their heads in disagreement. “Nonsense,” says the Frenchman. “They’re naked…

A mathematician And an engineer decided to take part in an experiment. They were both put in a room and at the other end was a naked woman on a bed. The experimenter said that every 30 seconds they could travel half the distance between themselves and the woman. The mathematician stormed off, calling it…

My wife found me in the kitchen in the middle of the night, naked, with a pot on my head and a gun in my hand… “What the hell are you doing?” she screamed, shocked at my appearance. “Quiet woman! I’m hunting decepticons!” I whispered back harshly. She put her hands on her hips. “You’ve…

Three young boys are exploring the woods near a river One of the boys is crouched behind a rock and is looking at something. He calls the other two over to look with him. In the river is a beautiful naked woman bathing. One of the boys immediately starts running in the other direction screaming….

Three men are discussing Adam and Eve The Frenchman says “Adam and Eve must be French. They are beautiful, and naked, and have all the world’s beauty before them.” The Englishman says “Not at all. They are residing in the most beautiful, perfect Garden. They must be English.” The Russian says “They are without clothes,…

Damn You Autocorrect A year ago, drunk and lonely, I stumbled upon Reddit by mistake when I was looking for RedTube. A year later the difference is obvious; one is a site full of naked people with no self respect, moaning and saying or doing all sorts of degrading things just to get some attention….

An old Soviet joke.. An artist is commissioned to create a painting celebrating Soviet–Polish friendship, to be called “Lenin in Poland.” When the painting is unveiled at the Kremlin, there is a gasp from the invited guests; the painting depicts Nadezhda Krupskaya (Lenin’s wife) naked in bed with Leon Trotsky. One guest asks, “But this…

An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a Russian are looking at a painting of Adam and Eve The Englishman admires it and says “Look at them, calm, reserved, and proper, they were surely English.” The Frenchmen laughs and replies “They are naked and beautiful, there is no doubt they would be French.” The Russian slowly shakes…